A Dainty Diary of Lifting

Dear Diary: The beginning of BTFC and fitness goal setting

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So, I created this blog about a month ago. Obviously I suck at generating content. So I’m going to try something new.

Yesterday, I signed up for Reddit’s 4th round of BTFC. Basically, anyone on the internet can now watch me fail to reach my goals in real time! Ta-da!

Ugh. I mentioned this fitness challenge to a friend and she signed up. Despite the fact that I’ve never really had an interest in doing it, I decided to join her. I mentioned in my introductory post that even though I’ve made a lot of progress, I am consistently disappointed that I haven’t made more progress. I’m kind of hoping that posting where I know the organizers and some of the viewers will keep me accountable and I can be a bit more strict for 12 weeks.

And so that’s how I set the lofty goal of getting my weight down to 135lbs by December. I mean, I entered BTFC not because I’m planning to win, but because I want to look hot when I got home for Christmas. And now I feel like I’ve set an unreasonable goal. I lost 6 lbs in 9 weeks over the summer. And now with school back on, I’m planning to drop 25lbs in 12 weeks? HA!

I think this issue is a recurring problem for me. On the one hand, I am more than capable of setting reasonable short term goals and achieving them – go to the gym 3 times/week this semester? Easy. Squat 225lbs by the end of the summer? Did it. Finish a 5K? It’s about to happen. Follow an IF protocol this week? And again next week? It’s happening.

So why do I get stuck on my long-term goals? I aim for the moon and shoot for the stars and then I inevitably feel disappointed with myself because I didn’t reach my goal. And this isn’t like my nebulous, never gonna happen goal, which is to look like Christmas Abbott. I mean, I only lost 60lbs last year, when my goal was to lose 100. And then I totally discounted all of the blood, sweat, tears and zumba that I put into losing those 60lbs. In reality, I should have been breathing a sigh of relief.

I think part of my problem is that I am still so new to fitness. I’ve learned a lot in the past year. But I still don’t have a good idea of what I’m capable of and in what time frame. I certainly have no clue what weight I’ll end up settling on, because I have no idea how my body will look 25 or 50lbs from now. Hopefully, I’ll get better at setting goals as I continue my journey and figure out what works for me, and what doesn’t.

And in some sense, I recognize that having ambitious goals is what drives me forward and motivates me, even if I fail to meet the deadline. At some point, I will have lost 100lbs, even if it wasn’t in June 2012. And I wouldn’t want to settle for a goal that was too low, when I know I could have given more effort. To some degree, I recognize that many of my goals are moving targets that I may never achieve – I’ll always aim to be better, faster, stronger, hotter and that’s okay.

Anyway, I’ve now publically stated that I’m going to lose 25lbs in the next 12 weeks. So here I am, documenting my progress and hoping I don’t go crazy.

I started off with a bang today. I went and swam some laps this morning. Adult swimming lessons starts tomorrow and I’m terrified the instructor will tell me that I need to go back to Level 1, which is basically guppy lessons. Swimming tuckered me out. My arms and ass and thighs all feel sore. But I’m going to be pressed for time during my lifting session tomorrow, so I went to the gym and did some upper body work – OHP, rows and DB BP. I also squeezed in a run, because my first 5K is in two weeks. Eep!

My arms feel like jello and I needed a nap by the time I was done at the gym. That means all of my fat cells are dying, right?


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