This week’s recap is mostly a gastro-intestinal overshare. My weight was actually up for my weekly weigh-in yesterday, despite the fact that my nutrition has been on point. But I’ve been walked around feeling bloated and gassy and backed up all week. On Wednesday I even joked that I was 5 months pregnant because my stomach was just that distended.
After talking to my coach, I am going to try cutting back on dairy and moderating my bean intake. Although… I am travelling up North all this week. I am bringing a suitcase full of protein bars, but who knows what my nutrition will end up looking like. When I get back I might attempt the “strictly no dairy, including whey” experiment, but I’m not willing to commit to that while I’m away. I’ve switched over to a vegan protein powder for now, at least and we’ll see if that helps.
When I get back I’d also like to play around with my meal and lifting schedule. I’m eating 4 meals a day, but I think with some adjustments I could happily get by on three. Right now I feel like I’m bordering on overeating everyday.
Preparing to travel has also totally screwed up my lifting. I am so stressed out. I stayed late at work every day this week, and only had 45 minutes at the gym on Friday. I hit 280×3 on squats but it was basically a “Oh, I’m in the hole? Better use some leg drive to get back up.” kind of day and then I failed my final OHP workset. Poop. (And I don’t even want to talk about deadlifting yesterday.)
I am really excited for my trip. I’ve worked for this program for three years and I’ve never been up North, so this is going to be a great experience for sure. I just feel like my training has suffered as a result, and six weeks out from a competition I’m not feel quite as confident as I’d like to feel. I’m hoping that I will more mentally invested when I get back on Friday.
I will say that mentally, I am totally okay with where I’m at. Despite the fact that shit is crazzzzzy, I’ve been making decent nutrition choices. Even if they’re not perfect, I am exceeding my minimums. Maybe it’s not my main focus at the moment, but it’s not being neglected either. Probably the first time in my life I’ve ever felt this way, because normally when everything goes to shit I find myself at Harvey’s / A&W / MacDonald’s / Burgers ‘n Fries Forever.
One thing I think is helping is that I’ve started taking 5-HTP on the recommendation of one of the PN coaches. She gave me a solid scientific explanation of how it helps increase serotonin production. I’ve been reading about how this is an alternative SSRIs although instead of preventing reuptake they actually increase serotonin and melatonin production, but since it’s not patentable, there is not a ton of interest in research / prescribing it. I have noticed that my mood is more stable. I am still feeling anxious about my meetings next week and the fact that I am bloated and got a terrible haircut this week. But I haven’t felt the need to cry about any of it, and that’s a big freakin’ deal for a cry baby like myself.
And I feel like my head space is good enough to see that even if I didn’t lose weight this week, even if I had a crappy week in the gym and even if I’m so bloated that my fat pants are tight, if I just keep doing what I am doing, I will get to where I want to be soon enough.